The Reset · Edition 17 · 29 October 2026
Lift Like You Mean It
Why picking up your child is a strength skill, and how to stop paying for it in your lower back.
Photo: Darius Bashar / Unsplash
How do you lift a toddler without hurting your back?
To lift a toddler without hurting your back, hinge at your hips first, not your waist. It sounds like a small distinction. It is not. That shift, getting into the habit of sending your hips back before you reach down, is what separates the parents who are fine from the ones who seize up on a Tuesday morning for no apparent reason.
You lift your child roughly forty times a day. Out of the cot, into the car seat, up from the floor, onto the changing table. None of those lifts feel like exercise, which is exactly why they are so easy to do badly without noticing. By the time your back complains, the pattern is already well established.
The good news: you already know the movement. A toddler lift is a deadlift. Set up for it the same way, hips back, spine long, the load close to your body, and the thing that has been quietly grinding you down becomes something your body handles without drama.
That is this week's edition. One drill, a few minutes, no kit beyond a broomstick and something soft. If you spend any time around Kensington & Chelsea doing school runs, pram walks and everything in between, this is probably the most useful thing you will do for your back this month.
The move: 10 minutes, a broomstick and a cushion
Practising the exact pattern you use forty times a day means your body stops improvising and starts repeating something that works.
- 01Stand with feet hip-width apart, a broomstick held against your back with both hands (one at the neck, one at the lower back). Hinge forward from the hips, sending them back, keeping the stick in contact with your head, upper back and tailbone throughout. That is the shape you want every time you lean down to pick something up. Repeat 8 times slowly.
- 02Put the broomstick down. Hold a cushion against your chest with both hands. Feet hip-width or slightly wider. Send the hips back and down into a squat, keeping the cushion close to your body and your chest tall. Stand up by pressing through your heels. This is the 'off the floor and into your arms' part of the lift. Do 10 reps.
- 03Combine them: hinge to reach the imaginary toddler, bring the cushion into your chest, then squat up to standing. Slow, deliberate, nothing rushed. 8 reps.
- 04Finish with 10 slow hip circles, hands on your hips, to release any tension in the lower back.
The plate
A snack box that survives the pram
Not a recipe, more of a system. One small container that lives in the changing bag and gets refilled on Sunday. It keeps you from arriving home ravenous after a long school run with nothing sensible to hand.
- ·A handful of roasted almonds or cashews
- ·2 oatcakes
- ·A small chunk of hard cheese (Cheddar or Parmesan work well)
- ·A couple of Medjool dates or dried apricots
- ·A small piece of dark chocolate if you like
The shortcut: Roast a big batch of nuts at the start of the week, 180 degrees for 8 minutes, and portion from there. Everything else is assembly.
Where we eat
Dishoom Kensington, Derry Street
Dishoom Kensington sits inside the Barkers Shopping Arcade on Derry Street, which makes it an easy stop if you are already in the area. The Kensington outpost has the same Bombay café atmosphere as the other sites, dark wood, low light, the smell of chai arriving before you have even sat down. It is the kind of place where you can take your time over a table, or eat quickly if the afternoon has other plans. Worth knowing if you are in this part of town and want something that actually feels like a meal.
4 Derry St, London W8 5SE, UK · View on map →
The K&C Mum
Spa
Cloud Twelve Wellness, Spa and Kid's Club, Colville Mews
Cloud Twelve in Colville Mews is the sort of place that is genuinely useful rather than just nice to know about. The wellness, spa and kids' club under one roof means you are not having to choose between looking after yourself and being somewhere your small person is well looked after too. It is calm, considered and in a quiet mews setting that feels removed from the busier streets nearby. Worth having in your list if you are in the Notting Hill and Kensington area and want somewhere that works for the whole day.
2-5 Colville Mews, London · View on map →
Good to know: Registering the birth
If your baby was born at Chelsea and Westminster Hospital, or anywhere else in Kensington and Chelsea, you register the birth at the Kensington and Chelsea Register Office in Chelsea Old Town Hall on the King's Road. According to GOV.UK, every birth in England must be registered within 42 days. The office works by appointment only, booked online, and appointments are usually available within five working days.
Source: rbkc.gov.uk
Expecting, or a new mum? The K&C Mum brings a find like this, and a note like this, every week, for subscribers who ask for it. Get it with The Reset → See the whole guide →
The note
Swap the side you carry your toddler on. Most of us have a favourite hip, a default arm, a side we always reach with. Your body adapts to whatever you repeat, so the asymmetry builds quietly over months. Try the other side for a week. Your back will notice before you consciously do.
Train with Barone
Sessions are 60 minutes, one-to-one, at home or in the studio, with no gym membership needed. The 20-session block works out at £110 a session and is where most clients land.
Alessia Barone runs one-to-one Pilates and personal training in South Kensington (SW7), a few minutes from Gloucester Road, serving Kensington & Chelsea by appointment.
Book a consultation →Good to know
- How do you lift a toddler without hurting your back?
- Hinge at the hips first, sending them back before you reach down, keep the child close to your body as you lift, and stand up by pressing through your heels rather than pulling through your lower back. The pattern is the same as a deadlift, just done in a kitchen or a car park.
- Why does my back hurt from carrying my child even when I feel strong?
- Strength is only useful if you are moving in a pattern your body recognises. Most back strain from carrying children comes from repeated small lifts done with a rounded lower back or a twisted spine, not from any single dramatic movement.
- Can Pilates help with back pain from carrying a toddler?
- It can help you build the awareness and control to move better before pain sets in, and it can support recovery if you are already noticing discomfort. If you have persistent or sharp back pain, check with your GP or a physiotherapist first.